You wake, half-human, half-regret. The sun hasn’t risen — but something else will. And it begins here.

Not with prayer.

But with grinding.


🌑 Step 1: The Grind — Awakening the Sacrificial Beans

You select your beans like a sinner picks a confessional: trembling hands, guilty taste. They’ve been dark-roasted to within an inch of redemption — bitter, bold, and begging to be broken.

You grind them down slowly, sensually — a coarse-to-fine exorcism. What was once whole is now humbled, ready to bleed flavor under pressure.

(Note: No pre-ground blasphemy. We want fresh victims.)


🔥 Step 2: The Heat — Flame and Extraction

You load the portafilter like a loaded confession.

Tamp it down — firm, even, dominant. No mercy. This is espresso, not a therapy session.

Then — lock it in.

Hit the button. Listen to the hiss.

The machine comes alive, a coiled beast conjuring pressure and heat. Inside, hot water forces its way through the bed of grounds — a violent, consensual release — birthing dark, golden crema like sweat on satin.

This is not coffee.

This is extraction. Pure, pressured intimacy.


🥛 Step 3: The Milk — Frothing the Innocent

Milk, cold and naive, enters the pitcher unaware.

You plunge the steam wand in with ritualistic intent. It screams, hisses, writhes — microfoam forming as the temperature climbs. Air and milk merge like lovers in a fever dream.

You tilt, swirl, dance the pitcher with practiced touch — not to boil, but to coax. You’re not cooking milk. You’re transforming it.

Velvety. Thick. Lustrous. A foam that begs to be poured.


💦 Step 4: The Pour — Latte Art or Foreplay

Now comes the climax.

Espresso waits below, dark and brooding, as you pour the milk in — slow at first, then with flourish. Circles, hearts, leaves, even accidental genitalia if the morning hand slips.

Latte art isn’t decoration.

It’s signature. A flourish. A mark that says:

“I was here. I made this. I conquered my morning.”


🫦 Step 5: The First Sip — Communion Begins

You cradle the cup.

It’s warm. Alive.

You lift it to your lips like a chalice of sin and comfort. The foam kisses you first — light and airy — before the coffee hits. Bitter velvet. Creamed fire.

And in that sip?

Salvation.


Your latte isn’t just a drink.

It’s an act. A consensual ritual of heat, pressure, texture, and transformation. A submissive little miracle that starts your day wet, warm, and just a little bit wicked.